i have been and still am

i have been alive a long, long time
some of it in prose, some of it in rhyme
i see the calendar pages turning
but in my favor it is not,
the cruelty mounting, watching
mankind rot
i pray so hard for this to change
lost in a world twisted and deranged
i take each breath in hope unsurmounted
looking away, as the days are counted
the tortured eyes of souls innocent
i wonder where god’s garden went